The Adventures of Fripp

So how can Nix thank you all for being so brilliant and following my blog...she decides to sit on her backside all day so there’s nothing to write about. Yes I know it was very windy this morning and yes I know it’s been pouring with rain all day but that’s really no excuse is it and I apologise on her behalf.   Best bit of the day was up at the old fort this morning when I found a place to poop that was really difficult for Nix to reach. It meant she had to go under or over the railings...doesn’t bear thinking about. She went through the red tape in the end, the very same red tape that I went through when I followed that cat onto the building site and got a good telling off. Seems there’s one rule for me and one rule for everyone else.  Speaking of rules, Nix is waiting to hear what Boris has got to say about the virus thingy...Nix thinks we’re all going to be locked in again. I don’t care as long as I get my walks and my turkey mince.  I did get a walk this afternoon wh...

 Nix has decided that cyclists with flashing lights are her pet hate now. “How can they see where they’re going in the dark, well they can’t can they, they’re just warning everyone to get out of their way.” It really annoys her and she says she hates them even more when they’re wearing Lycra whatever that it. She definitely needs to get out more. We’ve been up Southwick Hill today which is as you know one of my favourite places. Nix is definitely getting a bit slow these days, she’s always so far behind. As I was leading the way I managed to wangle the extra bit of the hill including the woods and the muddy puddles, great for a quick drink. It’s pretty lethal up there (for some) very muddy and lots of bramble hoops. Headline news...Nix managed to stay on her feet. There was a big German Shepherd who was a bit full of himself. He tried to mount me lots of times but I was too fast for him. I felt that after the frequent attempts to mount me, it was only fair that I mount the first av...

I’m being described as a drama queen at the moment...a drama queen! There is nothing queenie about me I can tell you, I am a king...a king of all Beardies.  I expect you’ll want to know why these negative aspersions are being cast upon me... by Nix.  Well...it all started last night after supper when Nix gave me a dried fish cube. Those things are quite sharp but apparently good for my teeth. Anyway I don’t know what happened but something got stuck in my throat. I offer no apologies for ‘careering round the room like a lunatic’ and I offer no apologies for tearing pieces out of my new bed. If Nix was not going to let me out in the garden to eat the plants then I had to get something else down me. Trouble is we all know what happened last time I got something caught in my throat don’t we. I ripped up the bedding in the back of the car and swallowed it and Nix had to search my poop for three days to make sure there was none left lodged inside me.  She wasn’t about to let t...

Today’s been much better than yesterday which was very boring indeed.  It’s been very windy here today especially at the beach this morning. Unfortunately there were no fossilised fish for me to take home so had no alternative but to behave myself.  When we got home Nix had to  cook my turkey mince so I had a little rest. I could hear her gabbing on the phone and I don’t know why but when she says, “bye then, see you later...” it makes me jump up. I go rushing into the lounge and I’m all ready to go out again when I’m told we’ve only been back from our first walk for an hour or so and I’ll have to wait. See what I have to put up with.  Eventually after many false starts I actually got to go out again. We went to the vets in Brighton to pick up my medication and then to Hove Park for a proper walk. I met lots of dogs and there were no incidents as such but I did get told off for humping a very old lurcher. Apparently she was really really old and I could have knocked ...

I’m very bored today, I’m a Beardie in waiting. First of all I had to wait for Nix to get ready this morning. It takes her so long and the noises she makes. She says she’s stiff in the mornings and I understand she’s getting on a bit but I can’t see how all the moaning and groaning is going to help. She says it’s depressing, she can’t reach her own shoes laces any longer... well get some shoes without laces then, it’s not rocket science is it.  Anyway we got to the beach but it was very windy. Nix was annoyed because for reasons best known to herself she had boooked a four hour shopping delivery slot. This means we had to wait in from 9 o’clock until 1 o’clock for my turkey mince but we wouldn’t have had to if Nix had read the latest text properly which told her it would be delivered between 12 and 1. Anyway the shopping arrived and as usual the delivery child got too close. He kept handing stuff to Nix and she was trying not to touch anything he’d touched. As he was leaving he sai...

Woke up with a bit of a headache this morning. Nix said it was my own fault for not watching where I was going last night. She said I was too busy glaring at a brown dog tied up outside the local shop that I bumped into the rubbish bin. I pretended I’d meant to do it and blamed my headache on last night’s noisy weather. It scared me a lot, it was banging on the windows, I didn’t like it and tried to dig the floor up.  We went for a quick walk on the beach this morning as I had my hair appointment booked in for 9.30.  They were a bit busy so I got moved to later and I got an extra walk on the beach. Nix washed all my bedding so when I got in the car smelling lovely I would have nice clean bedding to lie on. I was a good boy at the groomers and I lay nice and still while Shelle shaved my tummy and those bits that can get a bit smelly.  I’ve had a nice bath now and a bit of a tidy up.  It gets dark very early now in the evening. Nix thinks this is a good excuse to wear ...

The clocks have changed...what’s that all about. I was ready at the usual time this morning and where was Nix...in bed! I wouldn’t mind but she wasn’t even asleep, just determined to stay in bed until it got to the time she usually gets up...totally unacceptable. We did get out in the end as Nix remembered she was Zoomimg later and she said it would give her more time to get ready...for what exactly I have no idea. What it did mean however was that I only got a ridiculously short walk, on the lead.  So she did her Zoom thingie and when it ended I let her know I was ready for a proper walk but it would not stop raining. Eventually it stopped and Nix decided we should go out quickly before it started again. She put her duvet coat on as it looked so cold out...wrong! By the time we’d got to the end of the road she was nearly passing out she was so hot.  When we got to the beach she decided to risk letting me off the lead which doesn’t usually happen on a Sunday because apparently...

Major fish failure this morning, having fought a seagull and won I puked it up before I could get home and do it in the garden...would have been good for tea tomorrow.  50mph winds today so Nix thought it would be a good idea to go to the woods at Lancing. We’d only been there five minutes when she decided she didn’t like the creaking trees. By the time we got halfway through she was catastrophising that the largest one would come crashing down. I’m not bothered, I could get out of the way as I’m very agile, Nix not so much.  Can I just say that you’re very lucky to get this blog post today as apparently something called iOS14 arrived during the night and Nix can’t find anything on her iPad or her phone. Didn’t help that it started in Spanish...Hola it said...she wasn’t happy.  She’s not happy either over all the new rules in Wales for the virus thingy.  Apparently there is a firebreak lockdown, I have no idea what that means and neither does Nix. She thinks it will ...

 Nix had one of her early morning Zoom thingies this morning which means I am dragged out earlier than I would prefer and then marched down the beach on the lead and expected to do my poopies quick sharp. This is never going to happen, a chap needs time to locate the perfect spot and then change his mind a few times. This cannot be accomplished in twenty minutes.  The lack of the poopies earlier meant it was a piece of cake to get another proper walk as soon as she’d finished her virtual coffee. Yes you heard it here first...virtual coffee. I mean what does that actually mean. I’ll tell you what it means, it means she sits on her own and has a coffee while everyone else sits on their own having a coffee. It’s so annoying when I could be out having a proper walk.  Finally got to the park, nothing much to report. Nix was talking to herself as usual. She orders this Siri woman to make phone calls for her because she’s too lazy to do it herself. Apparently she usually repeats...

Early sunrise walk on the beach with absolutely no incidents at all if you don’t count disappearing for ten minutes to eat a dead fish. Nix knows where I am but she says she’s not trekking over all those pebbles when she knows she won’t be able to get the fish off me anyway so she just sits on a bench and waits...suits me.  This afternoon we had a walk down the beach as far as the Church of the Good Shepherd. Nix likes to stay at the top of the beach, I like to be down by the sea. Nix’s poor old legs can’t take the strain of walking over the pebbles anyway. Do you know she wonders why I always walk miles away from her. Well the answer is if I do walk with her, all I get is, “You’re such a good boy Frippy, staying with your mumsie.”  It’s so embarrassing.  This afternoon we’ve been for tea and cake in Jackie and Peter’s garden. They live next door and it was their daughter Catherine and her husband Barney who used to walk me in the afternoon during lockdown.  They hav...

 Last night it started to rain, a lot, and as you know I do not like it when it rains, it scares me. I don’t mind it when I’m out on my walk as you can see from my photos but I don’t like it when I’m inside. I just couldn’t help myself, I had to get off the bed and start digging. Nix was very understanding for once but she does try to get me back on the bed. In the end I gave up and got on the bed and was just drifting off when there was this really loud scary noise. Nix said it sounded like a very loud demented dalek whatever that is...it was very scary and made me and Nix really jump. Turned out to be something to do with her phone and the battery going...is it too much to ask that she keep a check on these things, nearly gave me a heart attack.  It hasn’t stopped raining all day so there are only photos of me wet. I didn’t stay wet for long, I blotted myself off on the sofa first and then Nix’s bed. She thought there were towels on it but I’d dug them all up. The best news ...

 Nix is very happy today. Not only is her favourite programme ‘I’m a Celebrity’ coming soon, she has discovered that the crew are going to be wearing proximity meters. She wants one of course and she’s already scouring Amazon, I haven’t seen her this happy since before the virus thingy arrived. Apparently they buzz and flash if anyone gets closer than two meters...she is ecstatic.  I thought it was too good to be true that Nix had remained upright for quite some time. That all changed this morning when she tripped up the kerb and fell flat on her face.  Well to be fair she didn’t actually fall flat on her face, she sort of saved herself and ended up rolling on her side...very embarrassing. Good job she was wearing a duvet at the time, less bruises for you to have to look at hopefully. She has bent her finger backwards so I suppose we’ll all be hearing about that for the next month. Typically of course she blamed me. Apparently I had woken her up too early washing my bits ...

Had a great time on the beach this morning, lots of sand and Nix managed to fall down a sink hole, a really deep one. Annoyingly she had her wellies on so didn’t actually get her feet wet. I on the other hand got my feet very wet...and dirty.  I was encouraged into the sea to clean up but now there is sand everywhere at home. Nix has swept it up twice and there’s a big pile in the corner. She better get that in the bin quick smartish or I might be tempted to whoosh it with my ginormous tail.  Went out eventually for petrol but the garage down the road was closed so having moaned all day about it Nix has just found out it’s going to be a Waitrose...that’s put a smile on her face. 

 Nix and I have been resting for most of today, well it is Sunday, the day of rest. There were noisy skies again last night, scared me but I was okay, I didn’t dig too much. I did however block the route to the bathroom so Nix had to hold on a bit. I also kept jumping up because I thought I heard something. Nix said there was nothing there and I was being very annoying.  Today on our walk in the woods there were guns going off and I wasn’t scared at all. I don’t see why Nix can’t understand this. I know what guns are and they don’t scare me but the noisy skies do...who knows what they might be, it’s very very scary. There are no photos because Nix was too busy gabbing on the phone the whole time. She said if I bothered to walk with her she wouldn’t be on the phone but because I choose to walk half a mile away, she may as well talk to her friends. I am never half a mile away, that’s much too far. Nix had her 8am church Zoom thingy this morning. Did you know that I used to go to...