The Whole of August 2020

1 Aug - 31 Aug 2020

Met some of my special friends on the beach this morning. We couldn’t hang around because Nix wanted to get home to watch some old aeroplane called a Spitfire fly over. She convinced herself it was going to fly over the town when it’s obvious to anyone with any aeronautical experience like moi, it would fly along the coastline. So she waited in the back garden and where did it fly...over the coastline of course. Very annoying to think that we could have been on the beach and watched it properly all the way from Brighton to Worthing. I suppose the second attempt to see it was vaguely better than the first one at Devil’s Dyke when she didn’t see it at all. 

At the moment Nix is making frantic arrangements to see all her friends before the rules change again. She says we might not be able to have visitors again soon because of the virus thingy. I do wish they would make up their minds as it’s very confusing. Nix is already annoyed that people can go and drink in a pub but she can’t come into the vets with me next week when I go for my flush. I’m not bothered, me and Bron the vet can manage perfectly well without her though I am always glad that she is waiting for me in the car.

2 Aug 2020

Sorry no blog today. We had visitors and then when they went home Nix wanted to watch Ben and Doug splash down on their return from the Space Station.  That took ages and in the middle of that a dog went missing on the beach so we went down with treats and a spare lead. He’d been hanging around the beach all day apparently and had been returned home once and then escaped again. Stupid owners were staying in an Airbnb on the beach and the dog could get out of the gate. So it’s been a bit of a busy day.

3 Aug 2020

We’ve had a much more exciting day today so I am very happy. We got up earlier than usual as Nix was going to meet her friend Shelle, my groomer, for an early morning swim. I use the term ‘swim’ very loosely because of course Nix can’t actually swim, not properly anyway like me. Well we got there early so I could do my poo first and Nix very quickly decided it was far too cold to go in...something about having a heart attack...again.  So we went home and then had a walk down the beach and I bumped into Dizzy, he’s just moved in three doors down.  

Later on in the morning we went to one of my favourite places, Southwick Hill. There were lots of dogs there so really just the one minor incident which I thought was very good.  Nix thought not and said that when I was good I was very very good but when I was bad I was horrid. It’s some poem apparently from when she was a child and her mother used it on her. Something about a little girl with a little curl... seriously. Anyway the incident was over before it started and the other human didn’t mind and it was only a bit of a scrap and I didn’t start it anyway...

4 Aug 2020

So we’ve done quite a lot since we last spoke. Last night we went out at sunset and crossed the footbridge into town. I like it there because there are lots of smells but Nix said there was just a load of drunken idiots getting too close. 

This morning we went to the beach and I posed for some photos on the groynes and then we went home and I chilled out in the summerhouse for a couple of hours.

This afternoon we went off to the river at Cuckoo Corner. I was perfectly well behaved there but Nix said it was just because we only met one other dog. There were actually loads of dogs but Nix failed to spot them...shocking eyesight. The best bit of the day was when Nix took a photo of me in the long grass on the top path and when she checked it she thought there were a load of sheep in the field. You know how I say she can’t clamber up those hills, well she can more than clamber, she can fly up them if she has to. Thing is there were never any sheep, they were bales of hay...eye test time.

Sainsbury’s van with my turkey mince on board has broken down and as if that’s not bad enough they’ve exchanged my butternut squash chunks for Aunt Bessie’s carrot and swede mash. I don’t like swede and now we don’t have any squash to go in my food.  Nix will have to go the shops in the morning.

5 Aug 2020

Quiet day today, Nix has a bad hip so can’t walk too far or so she says. We did get to the beach this morning and of course a trip over the footbridge into town to buy my butternut squash. There was some confusion when we got to the shop when Nix asked the lady if they had any squash. She said no but she  could do her a fresh orange juice. Nix’s face must have said it all because the lady suddenly realised that Nix meant butternut squash and not orange squash.  Nix of course has only ever seen butternut squash in frozen chunks and didn’t recognise the two huge ones in the window. Anyway we brought them home and then of course Nix had to peel them. She said they were worse than the sweet potatoes she had to rely on when the virus thingy first started but she’s done it and my food is ready to go. 

On the way back Nix tried to get me to have my photo taken with a person I don’t know who was making a loud noise and singing. I don’t like the things they play and there was no way I was going to sit next to him. I was forced to endure it in the end but not too close.  The trauma of that was more than made up for when a really old chap passed us on his bicycle.  Nix said he was too close and he should slow down. Well he did when he bumped into a post and pretended that he meant to do it and got off and pushed his bike.  When we turned round though he had got back on and was cycling off. Nix seemed to think it was very funny for some reason.

6 Aug 2020

Well we’re in the wars here, Nix has a sore hip and I have a swollen port again and I was also a bit sick this morning. I’ve eaten my lunch though and I’m due at the vets tomorrow anyway for my flush so it should be okay. Nix is panicking of course, what if she has to drive me up to the referral hospital with cataracts and a bad hip.  She panicked so much she gave herself a visual migraine. It’s gone now but we’ve still been sitting around not doing much. She says it’s because it’s too hot and we were waiting in for my freezer bags.  Thing is they came when she was in the garden and fitted through the letter box anyway. Then we had to wait in for some cards to be delivered from a local artist. Would have helped of course if Nix had given her the correct address. We’re not at 46 any longer Nix...that was our last house in Hove.  Good job all the neighbours know where I live.

7 Aug 2020

So a bit of a disappointing day as my port was too swollen to get the flush done. Bron my vet said she didn’t want to keep trying, she’d rather wait. I still got admiring comments from the other vets and vet nurses expressing their amazement that I didn’t need to be sedated. You see I am a very good boy most of the time.  We have to wait now until the swelling goes down before we try again but she has to do an ultrasound thingy while she’s doing it so she said my kidneys look fine. We think the swelling was caused when we met an old friend the other day and he was a bit too boisterous with me. Nix had to ask him to stop but I fear the damage was done. 

So no photos from today but I thought you’d like to see me relaxing in the summerhouse last night.

8 Aug 2020

It’s very hot today, Nix said it’s the hottest day she’s ever known since we moved here. I’ve got a little fan to keep me cool but I’m still very hot. I should be going to the groomers on Monday but it’s had to be cancelled due to my swelling. I’m not really hungry in the mornings so Nix of course is carastrophising that’s it’s because I’m about to pop my clogs. Trust me friends, I have no intention of going anywhere so she should just relax. 

Unfortunately I can’t regale you with stories of the day because there aren’t any. This is because it’s too hot to go out but even if we did go out I have to stay on my lead until the swelling goes down so no chance of any incidents. Hopefully things will soon be back to normal.

9 Aug 2020

I’m feeling quite well today though it is very hot. Nix says my port is still swollen but she thinks it’s a bit better than it was. We went out extra early and I was allowed off my lead but only for ten minutes...that was more than enough time to get into mischief of course. I found some scrummy rubbish hidden behind a hut and some more buried in a bush. We relaxed all morning and Nix went to church on Zoom which always makes her happy though I could do without the ‘singing’ 

This afternoon we have driven to a small wood to be in the shade but it was too hot even there so we came home and now I’m bored again. Tonight though Nix has a friend coming over and they are going to try and stay awake until midnight to watch the meteors. That’s never going to happen, the wine’s out.

Here’s a photo of me over two years ago when I first came out of hospital. Nix put a mattress downstairs so we could still sleep together as I wasn’t allowed to do stairs. 

10 Aug 2020

I have some good news, my port is less swollen.

The rest of the news is somewhat tinged with naughtiness. I’m in the bad books on two accounts, one an error of judgement or thoughtlessness as Nix would put it and the other an unfortunate incident. So last night Nix’s friend decided it was too cloudy to see the meteors so they decided to go for a sunset ‘swim’ instead. It was very hot indeed so I took advantage of cooling off in the sea...not too deep you understand, just deep enough to cool off. So yes I was very wet when we got back and yes Nix had removed the duvet from the bed and replaced it with a single sheet and yes if I was to get on that bed to go to sleep it was going to make the bed very wet indeed. Thing is it went right through the sheet to the mattress and it was right in the middle so Nix had to go and sleep in the spare room in a single bed and I had to sleep on the floor because there was no room for me. Nix said I am my own worst enemy whatever that means.

The ‘incident’ was very unfortunate because I know how it infuriates Nix. The thing is there was this brown curly job coming towards us and yes I know it wasn’t the one I had the fight with but it was close enough. I took the stalking mode but that dog just kept coming. Nix spotted my stance and tried to bribe me with treats and a stupid voice but just as she got close and reached out to grab my collar I was gone. It was all over in a flash, I launched myself at the dog and a scrap ensued. I have to hand it to Nix, she was pretty fast this time, good job her hip was better. As usual, she apologised profusely to the owner who clearly knew what his dog is like and said not to worry about it, some dogs just don’t like each other... exactly!

I am showing you photos of when I was sick with an autoimmune disease called IMTP. That was quite a long time ago, before my kidneys went funny. I lost a lot of my coat but a friend called Jane made me a onesie to keep me warm. 

11 Aug 2020

Well considering I’ve been stuck in all day with the heat there’s not a lot to tell. She decided last night it would be a good idea to open the bedroom blinds so she could watch for meteors from bed. She fell asleep of course so didn’t actually see any and then when she woke up this morning she realised that she had to get across the bedroom with no clothes on. We have floor to ceiling windows and we do have houses that back onto ours that could see in. I got the blame of course because her night attire was still in the spare room where she’d had to sleep the night before because I’d made our bed soaking wet. 

We did go to the beach this morning but the other end from where the brown curly job was. I’ve had to put up with Nix complaining about the heat all day though I notice she was the one who took off for the beach to splash around while I got left at home. She said it was too hot to take me and anyway I can’t be trusted. 

I did get a little walk in the woods this evening and it’s proper meteor watch tonight so everyone will be up late...I shall be asleep.

12 Aug 2020

I have apparently been an exceedingly good boy today, bit like a Mr Kipling cake (UK joke) It’s probably because I’m so tired. Nix and her friend stayed up late last night to watch out for meteors but they both fell asleep in the garden. I felt obliged to guard the territory while they slept but there were flashing lights in the sky that weren’t meteors and I didn’t like that. I had to go behind the summerhouse and dig because I was scared and Nix couldn’t shout at me to stop because it was 2am in the morning. In the end she had to come behind the summerhouse too with all the spiders and bring me inside.

Nix went for a swim in the sea again today. She splashed around in the shallows with all the children... bit sad really. She should learn to swim like me. 

This afternoon we’ve been to a local park that has a big lake in it so I was able to keep cool and we walked under the trees. I love Nix.

13 Aug 2020

You know how I was saying yesterday that I really love Nix, well I’m not so sure now. She was well grumpy last night and for no apparent reason that I could see. Yes I woke her up in the middle of the night digging in the shower tray. She  shouted at me to stop but I couldn’t. She had to get out of bed and shut me out of the bathroom. She said her non slip shower tray cost a lot of money and I was ruining it. She went back to bed but I couldn’t sleep. There were scary lights in the sky but Nix couldn’t see them. There were lots of them and they really scared me and they made my head feel funny. 

Next thing I started to dig up the rugs...I don’t know why, it just made me feel better. Nix had to get out of bed again to tell me to stop but the lights in the sky were still flashing and I just couldn’t stop. It was very very hot so in the early hours we went for a walk round the block. We walked for 20 minutes and Nix wanted me to do a wee so we could have a lie in this morning. I didn’t do one single wee because I was too scared and anyway I’d done one on the rug at home.  Nix finally noticed the lights in the sky and we came quickly home. 

Every time Nix tried to go to sleep, I started to dig. I wasn’t doing it on purpose honest, I just couldn’t stop myself. In the end Nix made me get on the bed and she put my collar and lead on and held on to me so I couldn’t get at the rugs and we went to sleep together. 

Nix said she couldn’t function today because it was too hot and she was too exhausted. I felt great so persuaded her to take me to the woods. She also took me over the beach but I had to stay on my lead there because of the earlier incidents in that area. It’s probably a good job because I’m sure I sensed that brown curly job.

14 Aug 2020

I’m laying low...very low.

We’d just got comfortable in bed last night when there were more lights in the sky.  Nix can’t see them because the blinds are down but I know they are there because they make my head go funny and I get an urge to dig a big hole, preferably in the shower tray.  I think I’m trying to escape but I’m not really sure why I do it. Anyway having felt guilty for the entire day yesterday for shouting at me the night before she had promised herself she wouldn’t shout again.  What Nix doesn’t seem to understand is that whether you shout, “Stop digging!” in a really loud voice or move in very close and whisper, “Stop ******* digging!” it has the same effect...it makes me worse. She should be happy I didn’t wee on the rug this time.

15 Aug 2020

Apparently I might have let myself down again today.  Look, it’s not rocket science is it. To the left...just the beach. To the right...the beach and a lookalike brown curly thing. There was never going to be any contest so why does Nix insist on shouting orders. Anyway disappointingly it wasn’t my arch enemy so decided to do as I was told after that. Well I say ‘do as I was told’ because I’m assuming that pooping on the long trailing lead doesn’t count as being insubordinate. 

We haven’t been anywhere interesting today but supposedly we’re going somewhere nice tomorrow...promises, promises. Meanwhile Nix has been faffing around doing things like getting the heavy metal table down the side passage so she could sell it. She’s also been moving the bed in the spare room and guess why. Because last time she moved it she put the drawers facing the wall and then couldn’t get to any of her bed linen which she apparently needs a lot of because I keep making it muddy. 

16 Aug 2020

So where do I start, probably with the unfortunate incident that never was on the beach this morning. Annoyingly Nix saw the brown curly job before I did which is a miracle in itself considering what shocking eyesight she’s got. It gave her the time though to get hold of my lead and get the camera out so she could get photographic evidence of my ‘appalling behaviour’ to apparently show the behaviourist. She would normally march me away but she was so busy trying to film it I got in quite a few insults first. 

We went to the hill this afternoon and I tried to knock a Husky over but he was built like a brickhouse so didn’t get very far with that. The Husky then tried to knock me over which was a little more successful and Nix said it was my own fault and I’d better hope it hadn’t damaged my port again which is almost better. 

We got home just before the rumbles in the sky started and Nix put my thundershirt on and I went to sleep. She said she was very proud of me.

17 Aug 2020

I have no idea why this blog is so late, it’s not as if Nix has actually had anything to do today. She’s been lazing around all day and going in the sea...without me and generally trying to find things she put somewhere safe and now can’t find again.  One of the things she was looking for was my box of hair slides that I had when my hair was long. She hasn’t been near a hairdresser in months because of the virus thingy but even now the hairdressers are open she won’t go. Consequently her hair is getting madder by the day and can you believe she used my slides to keep her hair out of her eyes. I think she’s finally lost it and actually thinks she is a Beardie.

18 Aug 2020

Today my morning walk on the beach was cut short because Nix was on her own and she doesn’t trust her eyesight to see the brown curly job before I do. To make up for it I got to go to the dark wood which I think Nix thinks is like the dark web. She’s constantly looking over her shoulder, what for I do not know. Don’t worry I would always protect her but to be honest there are loads of people around, she just likes something to panic about. We met a really lovely rescue dog and she looked just like a Beardie, I liked her but she was very nervous and wouldn’t come close enough to get a photo together. She was two and had only been in her new home for two months. Nix took a photo of her for me to gaze at. 

We missed the Tuesday shopping slot, Nix’s fault, so we have to wait until tomorrow. I’ve got loads of food though, I’ve started on my reserves from the freezer. Nix has nothing, no bread, no milk, no cereal, no biscuits and to add insult to injury we must have had a power cut in the night and her Soleros have gone a weird shape. They’re all twisted and she can’t get the wrapper off, she said it’s my fault because all my frozen bags of turkey mince squashed them. 

The neighbours who have been walking me every afternoon since lockdown first started are finally going back to Ethiopia on Thursday so tomorrow will be my last walk with them. You know what this means don’t you...Nix will have to do it.

19 Aug 2020

It’s rained all day and hasn’t stopped once. The day has gone something like this... go for a walk and get very wet, come home and eat dinner and make kitchen floor very wet, get on towels on bed, dig up towels on bed, get told off by Nix for ruining her duvet cover and making her bed very wet, go to sleep. Multiply by five including the dinners and there you have my day, most of it was spent sleeping. 

The most exciting thing to happen was my organic salmon oil getting delivered and then later on the Tesco shop with my turkey mince. Nix for reasons best known to herself has ordered five packets of rich tea biscuits. She says it was a mistake but she’s really annoyed because she said if she was going to make a mistake she’d have preferred it to be with the chocolate digestives.  

PS My port is almost back to normal so probably get my flush next week.

20 Aug 2020

Fripp won’t be writing his blog today in memory of Willow. We are devastated to read that she has gone to the bridge and we know how devastating this must be for her family who really did try their hardest to get her better 😪

21 Aug 2020

It’s very windy today but we still went to the beach this morning...Nix nearly got blown over. I’m really missing Barney my afternoon walker because he has gone home to Ethiopia. When they left yesterday they came to say goodbye and I got extra cuddles. I think Nix’s eyes were leaking a bit, she said it was like her own children leaving home. I think this lockdown thingy has made her go a bit daft.

We went into town this afternoon as it is now Nix’s job to walk me at 3pm and I am used to going out at that time with Barney. We sat on a bench and Nix had a cup of tea from Hector’s Shed, one of our favourite cafes. We watched the river heading out to the sea and Nix said we had a bit of a moment.  We were thinking about Barney and how we wouldn’t see him every day now and I am missing him a bit. He sent a text with a photo of him with his own dog who he hasn’t seen for five months. They’d really missed each other and I’m only a bit jealous.

22 Aug 2020

Five years ago today on the 22st August 2015, a vintage Hawker Hunter jet aircraft crashed during a display at the Shoreham Airshow (West Sussex) killing 11 people and injuring 16 others.

The aircraft, a Hawker Hunter T7, failed to complete a loop manoeuvre and crashed, hitting vehicles on the A27 road. 

A MEMORIAL honouring the lives of the 11 men who died sits on the banks of the River Adur by the Shoreham Toll Bridge, which is near the crash.  

Thinking of their families today 😪🙏

23 Aug 2020

So you are all my witnesses, did Nix or did she not promise to take me to the Downs today. “Oh it’s too windy...” is the usual excuse when she can’t be bothered to go...it’s Beardie abuse that’s what it is.  Just because she had to get up earlier than normal this morning because they’d moved the church Zoom service to 8am... from 10am.  This really isn’t good enough as I usually have my first walk at 8am. I am not however going to argue with God, I prefer to argue with Nix. 

We went to Goring woods and we stopped at our favourite little trailer café on the beach and I saw Nix taking photos of her lemon drizzle cake and her tea in a china cup. That’ll be on Instagram later. 

I managed to lose Nix three times in the woods. She watches me like a hawk but she can never resist looking at her phone and I seize my chance. I can see her from the woods trying not to look panic stricken. Serves her right for not paying attention to moi.

24 Aug 2020

Nix is annoying me today, she keeps shouting, “Stop digging” from her sofa in the lounge. She doesn’t like me digging her bed up but she’s too lazy to get up and ask politely, just shouts orders. I’ve been banned from the bedroom now because she says she’s trying to watch The Chase and I keep annoying her. So...who’s the most annoying, the decision is yours. 

We haven’t done much today, God forbid Nix should actually get wet. Every time we were going to go for a walk it would start to rain. “Let’s just wait for it to stop” is getting boring now. I have only had three walks today and it’s gone 5pm already. 

I just noticed she’s left the main bedroom door open so just about to sneak back in there, I find the single bed in the spare room just a litttle too small for me.

25 Aug 2020

So last night didn’t go so well. Nix was fast asleep when something in the early hours made me want to dig up the shower tray. I woke Nix up and she jumped out of bed and landed in a bit of wee that had escaped by accident. It was not a thundering great pool of wee as Nix might suggest, just a tiny puddle. I was very scared of the weather and couldn’t stand still long enough for Nix to get my thundershirt on so she decided we should go for a walk round the block. All the street lights had gone out so it was very dark and hard to see where we were going.  It was a miracle actually that Nix didn’t trip over something, like her own feet. We made it home safely but I only did one quick wee while we were out, after all I’d done most of it next to Nix’s bed. 

We have very strong winds here, 50mph Nix says so we’re not going out so much, don’t want her blown over. We have had a couple of walks down the beach to watch the waves but it was too windy. The Olive trees are still standing.

26 Aug 2020

This afternoon Nix had our neighbours in for a cup of tea in the garden.  That’s the difference between dogs and humans...cup of tea...really.

After the neighbours left I got to go to the river and get muddy. Look if you are going to leave the door to the spare room open, I am going to get on that bed, dirty feet or no dirty feet. 

Nix has eaten two bags of chocolate caramel nibbles and now feels sick. Thank goodness she cooked my turkey mince first because now she’s good for nothing.

27 Aug 2020

We went to meet Debbie and Scruff this morning at The Bluebird café in Ferring.  We had a lovely walk first down the Ferring Rife...that’s a stream for anyone who isn’t from Sussex. Scruff and I had a good old dip, I stand, Scruff lies down and then we stopped for tea and hot chocolate at the café.  Nix had another cup of hot chocolate when we got back to the car and then complained all the way home that she needed a wee. It was quite a long walk and I’ve been asleep on the bed ever since we got back. 

Just woke up and Houston we have a problem. Can someone come round here and kill a very small and very silent fly that is really annoying Nix. It keeps landing on her knee and it might be small but it is fast.  Nix has tried various weapons starting with a tea towel and culminating with a very dangerous looking cushion. She’s missed it every time of course, shocking eyesight and she’s nearly had me a couple of times. Someone needs to do something before one of us goes mad or madder than normal in Nix’s case.

28 Aug 2020

So Nix and I are a bit fed up today. We drove over to the vet so I could have my bypass flushed but it was still too swollen. Bron my vet said it was loads better than it was but not good enough to have a go at flushing. I have to go back in two weeks so I’d better behave myself and not do it any damage.  

I was going to get my thyroid tested too today because Nix says I’m acting weird...moi...acting weird. She wants to take a good look at herself in the mirror. She says I’m naughtier than I used to be and I’m more anxious about things like the rain. Well yes I don’t like the rain, but who does. Nix says it’s not normal to shake with fear but you know what she’s like, always wants something to worry about. Anyway annoyingly the vet agrees with her so they’ll be after my blood in two weeks. I must admit I am getting a bit tired at the end of our walks so maybe, just maybe, she could be right. 

Nix has eaten a whole packet of Malted Milk biscuits as she said it would make her feel better. It hasn’t, she feels sick now...never learns.

29 Aug 2020

We’d had three walks by lunchtime because Nix kept thinking she was bored. This was mainly because I have perfected my ‘bored’ look and it makes Nix think she’s bored too, it’s like hypnotism. 

We’d been to the beach this morning but came back early because it was freezing. To make it up to me we got to go to a place I like but we rarely visit. Nix couldn’t remember of course why we rarely visit but I think she might remember now. She said she had a very close shave...not my fault, she should attend to her facial hair before it gets so bad.  Seriously though,  apparently there was a field full of sheep and I missed them. They were a long way away but I usually just ‘know’ they are there. I don’t think we’ll be going back unless Nix forgets about them again which is never going to happen. I like it there because it’s high up and we can look down to our river walk. 

Nix has always been fed up with people calling me a Dulux dog. Well now she’s got something else to worry about...apparently I’ve now become the AA dog. Nix says she doesn’t mind that so much because he’s not a real dog.

30 Aug 2020

So Sunday...a day of rest supposedly but that’s for humans, for us dogs it should be a day of walkies. As usual I allowed Nix the Zoom church service but it always ends the same and I know when that is so I get in position ready to bore through her with my stare. I won eventuallly but was forced/bribed to pose for some close ups before we got to go to the river.  

Did I tell you I had my own freezer. One thing about having a catastrophising owner is that there will never be a shortage of food for moi. She’s either panicking about what would happen if she had to go into hospital or what would happen if we go into lockdown again and they run out of turkey mince...?  I’ll tell you what would happen, I could start on the hundred odd tins she bought during the last lockdown just in case we would never ever be able to buy turkey mince ever again. 

31 Aug 2020

So Nix woke up this morning really really early. She was panicking about some non existent illness and couldn’t get back to sleep. This is good for me as I get a longer walk. The jogger nearly knocking her over took her mind off her imagined affliction. 

We’ve been down to the lagoon today and I met a rather nice Labrador. He was a really good swimmer but a bit thick I think because every time he came out of the sea he kept dropping his red ball at my feet. Did he really think I was going to throw it in for him, that’s what humans are for so I just took the ball and went on my way. I had to be bribed to give it up.

As there have been no incidents lately, I got an ice cream and so did Nix. Bearing in mind the morning’s hypochondria I feel Nix should be a little more careful what she eats. She had a chip butty when we got home...on top of ice cream and you can guarantee she’ll be having a Solero later. There’ll be tears at bedtime...